The Myth Index
Myth: He's a narcissist.
"Narcissist" is a label stuck on behavior people don't like. It names the behavior. It doesn't explain it.
What's really going on
What people sayShe only cares about herself because she's a narcissist.
What's realDescribe what he did. That you can check.
Behavior can be observed. A diagnosis can't.
The reasoning usually runs in a circle. They acted selfishly, which makes them a narcissist, which is why they act selfishly.
"I'm not diagnosing them, but" followed by a diagnosis is the same move with a disclaimer.
Describe what the person did. That you can check, and that you can answer.
That's circular reasoning: behavior, then narcissism, then "narcissistic" behavior.@therapy_bites, 2026